Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Can we just be friends?

Can men and women "just be friends"? Why or why not?




Yeah
There's quite a few guys who I don't like and who don't like me back that way that I talk to.

I am friend with exactly one (1) girl. But I am gay, so yeah..

Yeah
There's quite a few guys who I don't like and who don't like me back that way that I talk to.

>who don't like me back
how do you know?

Well, I'm sure they could. But I have plenty of bro friends, and they make MUCH better friends than women. They bring everything to the table in better quantity and quality than a woman except for sex.

All of my real life friends are girls, but all of my online friends are dudes.


>who don't like me back
how do you know?

I can tell. One has a gf already, one likes another, the other just doesn't show any signs of it.. I'm not a priority to listen to or anything, but we joke.

most guys don't bother with girls except to get a girlfriend or to get connections who can help hook them up. that's the truff. anything otherwise is a result of childhood friendships. male friends are usually much more entertaining.

Most of my friends are guys.

I have a really good female friend. She's promiscous and hot as f**k, it would be cool to have sex with her. It's not very high on my priority list however, and I have no romantic interest in her whatsoever. If it ever happens (it might, if I made the move) then cool, if not, I'm not losing any sleep over it.
I guess that's friendship, no?

Everything a woman does in a friendship, men do better.
The only time I ever see a woman in a circle of friends, successfully, is when she is/has sleeping with/slept with most/all of the males.
Men see things practically. They want something they get something to satisfy the want. Men almost always want sex, women give sex, women don't like f**king friends, friendship doesn't work.

Sometimes yes. But not too often, since a lot of women make poor friends because they are too used to backstab each other, which means they will backstab you eventually.

If one party is ugly, sure.

only if the guy is sexually satisfied.

Let's just say I am not friends with a single woman I wouldn't f**k.

only if the guy is sexually satisfied.

This. If the guy is horny, ever, he starts looking at the woman like a woman, and starts trying to get with her, which usually pisses the woman off, as women don't make friends with attractive men.

In my case, yes. My best friend is gay and I'm a lesbian.

Women make the sh*ttiest friends so, no.
I don't wanna hear about your ex, your daddy issues, your mum not letting your wear slutty clothes or how awesome Edward's hair is unless I am going to bang you soon.

Men are better friends because they don't play games and if they have a problem they usually tell you.
Women ain't nothing but trucks and hoes. They can be a good friend when you get to know them but never trust with personal stuff.
Men are not good friends when you have a girlfriend. Hard to have friends of the opposite sex when you're in a relationship.

i have like 3 friends that are girls..i am just friends with all of them...but i would f**k them if opportunity arose...im not looking for that though
they arent as entertaining as guy friends though

I think yes, they can. Sometimes at least.
Some men make great friends. They don't play games and don't backstab you nearly as often as other girls. Also they are usally down for a lot more sh*t because they don't constantly worry about their reputation and how others will perceive their actions. You cannot imagine how difficult these things can be with girls.
On the other hand, men will still be men. And men want to get their dicks wet. And they get pissed off like nothing else if you don't want their dick inside of you.
Also some dudes have aggression levels that can be hard (and scary) to deal with.
All has pros and cons.

No. Chicks are all c**ts in the end. There is no variable.

No. I've tried being friends with girls but this is what usually happens : things are all good for a while, until they do/say some of the stupid things women do. As I am not f**king her I have no reason to put up with sh*t like that, so I get pissed off. The girl gets sad, and we are no longer friends.

I have a really good female friend. She's promiscous and hot as f**k, it would be cool to have sex with her. It's not very high on my priority list however, and I have no romantic interest in her whatsoever. If it ever happens (it might, if I made the move) then cool, if not, I'm not losing any sleep over it.
I guess that's friendship, no?

This guy speaks for a lot of men. I'd bang most of my female friends if they were down for it and there were no consequences, but I sure as hell am not going to mess up the friendship. These are girls I've met and realized a romantic relationship wouldn't work out with, so did not pursue one with.


I can tell. One has a gf already, one likes another, the other just doesn't show any signs of it.. I'm not a priority to listen to or anything, but we joke.

unless you are that person you will never know the true intentions

can vampires and humans "just be friends"?
NO BECAUSE VAMPIRES GOT URGES YO.

i don't think you can encompass all men and women like this. Some heterosexual men can be friends with women, some can't. Then there are those like me who's minds have come so twisted they can't even look at a woman without paranoia and distrust and want to say "bitches and wh**res" when one opens her mouth.

My best friend is a girl, but she's a lesbian who cringes at the sight of a pride parade.
We get on cool. Also she is into bdsm and once lent me her girlfriend wrapped in a sheet for the day.
Woul;dn't trade her for anything.

Its only possible to be just friends with a girl you aren't attracted to that has a boyfriend.

Yes they can, but why would you want to be friends with a woman?

yeah, they can be just friends if the guy is a beta fa**ot.

You need to find girls that aren't too girly or immature. They do exist and they'll happily be your friend.

This question gets asked soooooo much.
Every time the answer is the same: YES.
Does it get harder if the guy is hot? Yes. But its still possible ffs. Get out of your basement for once.

no its not possible

Sooner or later one is going to have feelings for the other,
that or the girl is using you for your resources, which explains why most of you are lonely because you have nothing to offer for that friendship to take place
friendship is just a pretext to a complex balance of give and take

Only if the guy hacks off his dick in front of her with a rusty, dull knife.

Is the guy a beta male bitch?
Then yes being friends is possible.
Does the guy have a sense of self worth and moves on when he realises the bitch won't suck his dick?
No, it's not possible to be just friends.

Yes and no.
Sure, they can be friends and keep it platonic. But both parties would be lying if they said they never felt anything.

This question gets asked soooooo much.
Every time the answer is the same: YES.
Does it get harder if the guy is hot? Yes. But its still possible ffs. Get out of your basement for once.


Typical female response.
Guess what, all your male friends are actively trying to figure out how to f**k you.
You think it's a coincidence that every hot friend you've had you've f**ked?



Typical female response.
Guess what, all your male friends are actively trying to figure out how to f**k you.
You think it's a coincidence that every hot friend you've had you've f**ked?

lol my best male friends are my cousins. So no I don't think so.
But yeah, I do know some male friends who have crushes on me. Doesn't matter though because we are still just friends.
Obviously yeah if there is a mutual sexual attraction THATS when "just friends" gets more difficult and you end up upgrading to friends w/ benefits etc.


lol my best male friends are my cousins. So no I don't think so.
But yeah, I do know some male friends who have crushes on me. Doesn't matter though because we are still just friends.
Obviously yeah if there is a mutual sexual attraction THATS when "just friends" gets more difficult and you end up upgrading to friends w/ benefits etc.

You just repeated WHAT I SAID EXACTLY.
Goddamn, women sometimes.
Here's the thing though, most guys won't be friends with a fugly bitch.
So in any male/female friendship there is always at least one party attracted to the other.


You just repeated WHAT I SAID EXACTLY.
Goddamn, women sometimes.
Here's the thing though, most guys won't be friends with a fugly bitch.
So in any male/female friendship there is always at least one party attracted to the other.

Uh, usually fugly bitches are the first ones to have more male friends than female.
But even if "one party" is attracted you can still be just friends.

Sure they can. What, have you guys never had to interact with an older woman on a regular basis?
The problem you guys have is when you hear "can men and women be friends" your minds immediately jump to "can I and attractive women of my age group just be friends," which is obviously a much messier question than just being friends with women as a whole.
Obviously it's harder to just be friends with women you're sexually attracted to, but this is nowhere near the majority of women that walk the earth.


Uh, usually fugly bitches are the first ones to have more male friends than female.
But even if "one party" is attracted you can still be just friends.

Until you let your guard down and they F you in the A.
Literally of course.
And those fugly bitches with male friends, all those male friends are also fugly.
Its just people hanging with what they think they can get away with.


Uh, usually fugly bitches are the first ones to have more male friends than female.
But even if "one party" is attracted you can still be just friends.

please read ladder theory
too lazy to link

Ya I think its possible but just rare. Obviously a guy can be friends with a girl he finds unattractive but assuming she is hot I say its still possible. Im friends with a hot girl and I dont want to start anything with her; although she is a cool person she also treats guys she screws with badly. So just be happy with being friends. If one night we accidentally get wasted (as friends do) and f**k, cool but otherwise, nah

Ya I think its possible but just rare. Obviously a guy can be friends with a girl he finds unattractive but assuming she is hot I say its still possible. Im friends with a hot girl and I dont want to start anything with her; although she is a cool person she also treats guys she screws with badly. So just be happy with being friends. If one night we accidentally get wasted (as friends do) and f**k, cool but otherwise, nah

thats not just friends you f**king tard

"Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship." Oscar Wilde

oh and girl's cant keep secrets either
dont expect her to pay you back (as a friend)
and dont ever give her responsibility that she cant handle (anything for that matter)

If men and women can't be just friends then either everyone will be having sex or everyone is a complete stranger

In my case, yes. My best friend is gay and I'm a lesbian.

rona?

From my experience, sort of. My female friends are that because I find them to be unattractive, any other girl I've tried to befriend in the past was because I wanted to get with her, and I immediately cut off contact once it was clear nothing was going to happen. As for my current girlfriend, all of her current guy friends are guys that wanted to be with her. Once I came along they pretty much stopped talking to her

I have lots of female friends.
I am gay though.
But many of my straight friends also have female friends that I don't think they have sex with
...maybe they do?

One of my best friends from childhood later became friends with tons of women--he was always surrounded by them in high school but didn't have a girlfriend until college. Until then I thought he was gay. But we haven't spoken in years and I miss him.

ITT: People with opposite sex friends who are attracted to eachother but trying to justify or get defensive and say otherwise because they have a boyfriend, like the attention but are not hot enough for their opposite sex friend to want to pursue, or want to pretend they value the friendship and prove simple biology wrong.
Also ITT: Virgins in high school who have yet to find out men and women can only be acquaintances and nothing more in the real adult world where this sh*t doesn't fly and people soon stop kidding themselves.

ITT: People with opposite sex friends who are attracted to eachother but trying to justify or get defensive and say otherwise because they have a boyfriend, like the attention but are not hot enough for their opposite sex friend to want to pursue, or want to pretend they value the friendship and prove simple biology wrong.
Also ITT: Virgins in high school who have yet to find out men and women can only be acquaintances and nothing more in the real adult world where this sh*t doesn't fly and people soon stop kidding themselves.

wtf, no middle ground or some sh*t?


wtf, no middle ground or some sh*t?

Well the gay and lesbian crowd can have opposite sex friends for obvious reasons.
Historically men and women have not lived in societies were they can be friends until the last 50 years, and even then it's only in select countries and it's still something we are obviously struggling with.
Biologically we are not wired that way.
Gay people however have existed since humans have. Also you can be friends with your sister and brother sucessfully, because your body is supposed to emit chemicals that biologically repel eachother from sexual intercourse. Studies have shown brothers and sisters who have never met eachother do not generally find eachother sexually attractive when put in the same room.
Although web makes it seem like everyone wants to f**k their siblings, although I'm not sure why.
So everyone, be best friends with your girlfriend or boyfriend and be faithful and it will be great and be best friends with your sibiling and always be there for them. Wholesome story really. Men and women being friends just complicates simple things, creates drama, and makes people hide behind guises that shouldn't be there biologically.

ITT: People with opposite sex friends who are attracted to eachother but trying to justify or get defensive and say otherwise because they have a boyfriend, like the attention but are not hot enough for their opposite sex friend to want to pursue, or want to pretend they value the friendship and prove simple biology wrong.
Also ITT: Virgins in high school who have yet to find out men and women can only be acquaintances and nothing more in the real adult world where this sh*t doesn't fly and people soon stop kidding themselves.

well thats high horse bullsh*t


Well the gay and lesbian crowd can have opposite sex friends for obvious reasons.
Historically men and women have not lived in societies were they can be friends until the last 50 years, and even then it's only in select countries and it's still something we are obviously struggling with.
Biologically we are not wired that way.
Gay people however have existed since humans have. Also you can be friends with your sister and brother sucessfully, because your body is supposed to emit chemicals that biologically repel eachother from sexual intercourse. Studies have shown brothers and sisters who have never met eachother do not generally find eachother sexually attractive when put in the same room.
Although web makes it seem like everyone wants to f**k their siblings, although I'm not sure why.
So everyone, be best friends with your girlfriend or boyfriend and be faithful and it will be great and be best friends with your sibiling and always be there for them. Wholesome story really. Men and women being friends just complicates simple things, creates drama, and makes people hide behind guises that shouldn't be there biologically.

You learn all this in Psychology I.
Is everyone but you retarded?

No.
Anyone that says yes is lying to themselves, or is underage.
Or gay.

no its not possible

Sooner or later one is going to have feelings for the other,
that or the girl is using you for your resources, which explains why most of you are lonely because you have nothing to offer for that friendship to take place
friendship is just a pretext to a complex balance of give and take

Care to cite your sources?

No.
Anyone that says yes is lying to themselves, or is underage.
Or gay.

Are you a troll? I think you're a troll. THis whole thread must be infested with their sort, no rational human being would make so many unrealistic over-generalizations.


Are you a troll? I think you're a troll. THis whole thread must be infested with their sort, no rational human being would make so many unrealistic over-generalizations.

No, it's true.
The only people that actually fall for the 'we can be just friends' bullsh*t are people that are immature, virgins, gay people that don't know better, underage or too heavily immersed in 'bro culture' to get it through their skulls that a platonic relationship with your preferred sex is all but impossible and completely unrealistic. People you become close to, unless they are obese and ugly with several mental disorders, you will almost inevitably become attracted to.
Feel free to take a gender studies, social work or psychology course sometime bro.

Can men and women "just be friends"? Why or why not?

yes, if the man is asexual, or the chick is a lesbian/the dude is a homo.

Sure.
I currently have 5 or 6 female friends. Out of all of them, I am very close to two. One of them was a crush I had for a long time, but this was during a point in my life where I was heavily medicated and going through a rough time. I barely remember any of it, but we're still good friends even after everything. No longer attracted to her.
Now, the other one is a bit more tricky. She is absolutely the best woman I have ever met. Genuinely caring, intelligent, beautiful, and has a great sense of humor. Oh, and she's an absolute freak it seems and doesn't seem to be turned off by any sort of fetish. She's currently trying to figure out mine, but I'm too much of a chickensh*t to tell her. I know I love her, but I don't know if I'm in love with her. She's currently seeing a guy that is a lot like me, but they seem to be on the edge. I actually want them to work out because I want them to both be happy.
She is the best friend I ever had and I really haven't known her that long.

Sure.
I currently have 5 or 6 female friends. Out of all of them, I am very close to two. One of them was a crush I had for a long time, but this was during a point in my life where I was heavily medicated and going through a rough time. I barely remember any of it, but we're still good friends even after everything. No longer attracted to her.
Now, the other one is a bit more tricky. She is absolutely the best woman I have ever met. Genuinely caring, intelligent, beautiful, and has a great sense of humor. Oh, and she's an absolute freak it seems and doesn't seem to be turned off by any sort of fetish. She's currently trying to figure out mine, but I'm too much of a chickensh*t to tell her. I know I love her, but I don't know if I'm in love with her. She's currently seeing a guy that is a lot like me, but they seem to be on the edge. I actually want them to work out because I want them to both be happy.
She is the best friend I ever had and I really haven't known her that long.

That is a true BETA


That is a true BETA

The beta would be trying hard to take the girl from the other dude.
Alpha gives no f**ks.

The question is
do men and women want to be friends with each other
This is the million dollars question

Some of my bro's girlfriends are pretty cool, and I consider them my friends.

Some of my bro's girlfriends are pretty cool, and I consider them my friends.

but you want to bang them

Oh OP, you so crazy. I think you meant:
"Can straight men and women be friends without any sexual tension?"
The answer is NO.
A straight guy friend is your friend for that reason alone. To have a chance to f**k you. Don't believe me? Call one of them up right now and ask him for sex. You really think he'll decline?
Straight men only have female friends they're attracted to. The keyword is STRAIGHT. Why should a guy put up with a female's bullsh*t if he's not getting (or has the chance to get)anything he couldn't get from having a male friend?

I have tons of guy friends I'm not interested in. In fact, almost all of my friends are guys and I'm not really interested in any of them. I'm pretty confident none of them are interested in me either because I'm not very attractive, but I'm a good cook and apparently a fun person to be around.

Yes men and women can be friends. Im friends with plenty of women and I am a single man. Most of them I would like to f**k vigirously, but wouldn't because they are friends girlfriends or ex-girlfriends but that doesnt mean we cant be friends.

I have tons of guy friends I'm not interested in. In fact, almost all of my friends are guys and I'm not really interested in any of them. I'm pretty confident none of them are interested in me either because I'm not very attractive, but I'm a good cook and apparently a fun person to be around.

Here's a quick way to tell!
Call one of them up and offer to have sex. You'll know if they're a "true friend"...

Oh OP, you so crazy. I think you meant:
"Can straight men and women be friends without any sexual tension?"
The answer is NO.
A straight guy friend is your friend for that reason alone. To have a chance to f**k you. Don't believe me? Call one of them up right now and ask him for sex. You really think he'll decline?
Straight men only have female friends they're attracted to. The keyword is STRAIGHT. Why should a guy put up with a female's bullsh*t if he's not getting (or has the chance to get)anything he couldn't get from having a male friend?

you are very right


Here's a quick way to tell!
Call one of them up and offer to have sex. You'll know if they're a "true friend"...

Looks, a guy would pretty much sleep with ANY GIRL who just called him up and said, "F**K ME," whether he initially had it in mind or not.

Can men and women "just be friends"? Why or why not?

No, because women have vaginas, and men have penises.
/thread


Looks, a guy would pretty much sleep with ANY GIRL who just called him up and said, "F**K ME," whether he initially had it in mind or not.

true, but he thinks he has a better shot with you!

Easy answer: No. Assuming the guy likes vaginas and the girl likes dicks, someone with a dick and someone with a vagina can't be friends without any kind of sexual tension.
More correct answer: Sometimes. But it's not easy. First, I'd say that if part of you definition for 'friend' is someone you would never, ever, ever consider sleeping with, then I'd say your definition is narrow, and unrealistic (lol alchohol).
I'm a dude. I'm straight. The majority of my friends throughout my life (hurr durr I'm 21, not that old, but w/e) have been ladies. I'm told I'm an attractive guy, and the majority of my female friends are good looking. A few I'm not attracted to, but no swamp donkeys. Now, are there some of them, that if I called them up and offered them sex, they'd sleep with me? Probably. Are there some of them, that if they caled me and offered me sex, that I'd comply? Yes. Does this mean we're not friends? I believe the answer is no.
Take my friend Erika, for example. She's smoking hot. In fact, we've f**ked a couple times in the past. We're bandmates, and really, really good friends. We talk to eachother about just about everything, from relationships, to hookups, to just shooting the sh*t like I do with my bros. She's a very cool chick. Now, I know you're saying, 'you f**ked, so you have proven yourself wrong, nub'. I disagree. We were great friends beforehand, and honestly, nothing changed. Nothing. The difference is we know what each other looks like naked, and we know firsthand that we both happen to be very good at oral sex. The stuff we talk about with each other hasn't changed. We don't hang out more, we don't hang out less. Us sleeping together never became a 'thing', it happened a couple times, and then never again.
Cont'd...

Easy answer: No. Assuming the guy likes vaginas and the girl likes dicks, someone with a dick and someone with a vagina can't be friends without any kind of sexual tension.
More correct answer: Sometimes. But it's not easy. First, I'd say that if part of you definition for 'friend' is someone you would never, ever, ever consider sleeping with, then I'd say your definition is narrow, and unrealistic (lol alchohol).
I'm a dude. I'm straight. The majority of my friends throughout my life (hurr durr I'm 21, not that old, but w/e) have been ladies. I'm told I'm an attractive guy, and the majority of my female friends are good looking. A few I'm not attracted to, but no swamp donkeys. Now, are there some of them, that if I called them up and offered them sex, they'd sleep with me? Probably. Are there some of them, that if they caled me and offered me sex, that I'd comply? Yes. Does this mean we're not friends? I believe the answer is no.
Take my friend Erika, for example. She's smoking hot. In fact, we've f**ked a couple times in the past. We're bandmates, and really, really good friends. We talk to eachother about just about everything, from relationships, to hookups, to just shooting the sh*t like I do with my bros. She's a very cool chick. Now, I know you're saying, 'you f**ked, so you have proven yourself wrong, nub'. I disagree. We were great friends beforehand, and honestly, nothing changed. Nothing. The difference is we know what each other looks like naked, and we know firsthand that we both happen to be very good at oral sex. The stuff we talk about with each other hasn't changed. We don't hang out more, we don't hang out less. Us sleeping together never became a 'thing', it happened a couple times, and then never again.
Cont'd...

This is the part where I continue and beat the anon.

This is a perfect example of how the presence of sexual tension, and even the event of sexual congress between a guy and a girl does NOT negate the fact that they can be friends. Is it easy? Nope. I've learned the hard way that there are a lot of pitfalls in having female friends as a dude. Friendships have ended when it became clear that one of us was only there due to sexual interest (on both sides. I have cut of female friends who became my friend to try to get with me. F**king creepy).
One of the most important things is to make strong sexual interest clear early, if it's there. If you want to date someone, don't become their friend in hopes that it'll happen someday, make it clear you want them. It'll happen or it won't, and you can move on. It's natural to have a passing desire to see your hot friend with you penis in her mouth, acknowledge it. If you start to be able to think of nothing but her, and relationsh*t stuff, then recognize that, make a move, and if it fails, move on. You failed at that friendship. It's not always going to work.
That said, when it does, it's worth it, just like the effort you have to put into any truly awesome friendship. You have to work at friendships with your bros if you want them to be meaningful (the guy who's going to be my best man - I'd do anything to help him out, he's like a brother to me. ), the same is true of friendships with chicks. It's just a slightly different kind of work (unless you're a ghey, in which case, I imagine being a f** with f** friends is somewhat similar), since if your bro called you up and wanted you to put your penis in him, you wouldn't want to, as opposed to your hot friend Stefanie.

Guys saying no have never had a meaningful relationship with a woman.

I've been friends with essentially the same group of people since third grade, an even mix of guys and girls. None of us have really inter-dated (a couple isolated cases in 6th/7th grade, meaningless kid stuff). We all hang out, our dating is with people outside of the group though everyone's welcome to have a date tag along with us. We discuss sh*t openly with one another and know that we're there for each other.
Feels normal and healthy man.
(Also, I suspect this is all because we've been friends since we were eight. Maybe we just feel too much like family to be f**kin'.)

We're E-friends. I have interest for something but it isn't likely. Because we're pretty much a country away.

I was friends with a girl for almost 6 years now, and even then I couldn't resist the idea of kissing her when we had those weird moments sitting in a car just talking. Of course we never did anything.
Might be why she stopped talking to me though, because I never realized she liked me, and shes avoiding me.
Or maybe it's because I got mad and said stupid things to her.
I'll never know.

OP
IS that YOU with Daisy?

OP
IS that YOU with Daisy?

who wants to know

Pic is like the epitome of friendzone.

I think what's getting in between you two is the random f**king leg.

IT'S NOT A RANDOM LEG YOU F**KIN IDIOTS
You can clearly see the head of a kid and his other foot durr

IT'S NOT A RANDOM LEG YOU F**KIN IDIOTS
You can clearly see the head of a kid and his other foot durr

You can clearly see that leg belongs to no one


You can clearly see that leg belongs to no one

Mr. one leg has a full shadow.

I think what's getting in between you two is the random f**king leg.

ghost leg


ghost leg

>implying ghosts have shadows

Of course they can and I don't even see what is there to be explained about it.

I'm pretty sure the guys i was friends with in school didn't want to f**k me, and if they did, it was just in a "meh, ok" sort of way. same with guys now...i think once they get to know me a little they get turned off to the idea.
also, i dont think having romantic or sexual desires for someone makes friendship impossible, or somehow inherently false.
And what about children and the elderly? you can totally be buds with kids and old people without wanting to f**k them. well, except for on web...

I'm pretty sure the guys i was friends with in school didn't want to f**k me, and if they did, it was just in a "meh, ok" sort of way. same with guys now...i think once they get to know me a little they get turned off to the idea.
also, i dont think having romantic or sexual desires for someone makes friendship impossible, or somehow inherently false.
And what about children and the elderly? you can totally be buds with kids and old people without wanting to f**k them. well, except for on web...

>having romantic or sexual desires for someone makes friendship impossible,
wut

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